This Is It…

“THIS IS IT” I was told at 18yo when I asked if there is more to life…. My life felt mundane, unsteady and depressing to me even though I was an accomplished dancer.

It meant nothing to me. All I felt was pressure to BE MORE and DO MORE. My intuition argued against what I have been told. I refused to believe that there wasn’t more to life. I was willing to look for MY VERSION of MORE everywhere, even if it meant with the wrong people, at times, and if it meant moving over 5 thousands miles AWAY from my home. Back then I found my calm moments in the physical movement ONLY. I was trying to dance my way out of the way I felt many times only to feel the same shortly after. Fast forward over a decade later it was a love AT FIRST BREATH when I tasted and felt my full drop into inner self. It wasn’t that I wasn’t breathing consciously during dancing. What I was lacking was WHO I GIFTED the practice to! Dance is a performance and perfection-based platform. Unlike Yoga, you are receiving evaluation, seeking approval and ovation from your audience which can be exhausting and debilitating to your mental health. I found my fullest calm and presence in STILLNESS during edgy still yoga poses but it TOOK A LONG TIME to get there, I struggled MANY times. My mind played games and pretended not to listen. Distractions tasted as a sweet rescue.

The LOVE for the practice wasn’t enough as it didn’t guarantee inner calm if we don’t expose ourselves to CONTINUOUS moments of stillness. Consistency is the key. A little dose of intentional unravelling each day.

It took perseverance and vulnerability on a whole new level as that is what internal work takes! It took devotion and discipline to not want to give up to soften my wanting mind from stimulation and distractions that were charged with many justifications.

I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT TOO! The Heart-well state is at your heart steps.